Happy Birthday to Me.
I have completed another trip around the sun. It was the worst trip I've ever had.
I'm not alone in my misery over the past couple years. It's been a rough two years for just about everyone. Especially for health care workers, like myself. And even more so when taking care of a parent with a chronic illness, like me. It was the trifecta of suffering.
So here I am, on my 52nd birthday (52! WTF???) feeling like I have no idea who I am. I've spent so much time in the past several months taking care of everyone else, putting everything else before my own needs, working long hours in less-than-ideal circumstances that I feel like an empty shell. Everything I thought I was seems to have leaked out somehow. And it's been replaced by sarcasm, cynicism , and simmering anger that sits right below the surface.
I don't like being like this. It's not me. I don't want to be like this anymore.
The thing is- I've been down this road before. I've been lost before. I've been disillusioned. I've been stuck. And I've always found a way through.
Which is what I need to do over this next year. I need to find my way back to myself.
So at the end of my NEXT trip around the sun, I'll arrive with a lot less baggage.
1 comment:
Happy birthday!
Totally feel your pain taking care of the aging parents too. My dad was recently diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, and he's refusing treatment. It's not going to be a fun 2022.
Post a Comment