Bad Dates at Work

It's been a while since we've had a Tuesday's Bad Date. Probably because I've been a bit of a hermit when it comes to anything to do with dating.

This TBD selection illustrates that point very well.

A couple months ago, a new doc started at the place I work. We'll call him Dr. Tam. I'm not sure what Dr. Tam's specialty is; physiatry? Whatever. That's not really relevant to the story. What is relevant is that every day since he started, I have smashed into him in the hallway at least once.

I'm not sure why this is so. Probably because he walks really fast and doesn't always look where he is going. Add to that: I walk really fast and don't always look where I am going. Not a good combination. Oftentimes ends up in a *** smash! *** collision in the hallway.

The collisions usually happen outside the waiting area when we are both going to get our respective patients. But I have smashed into him outside the bathroom, in medical records, and in the cafeteria. I spilled his soup all over the place. Luckily, he had an extra lab jacket with "Dr. Lee Tam" (not his real name) emblazoned on the lapel.

"Why do I keep smashing into you?" I said after the soup incident.

He very wisely said "I don't know" before he scuttled off for his clean lab coat.

In the staff office, I started bemoaning my klutziness. "OMG! I smash into that guy every. single. day! Sometimes two or three times a day! What is wrong with me?"

About four co-workers stared fixedly at me.

"What?"

"Is he single?" one of them asked.

"I don't know."

"Well, is he wearing a wedding ring?"

"I don't know."

"You have to notice these things! If you smash into a guy, you should look to see if he is wearing a wedding ring! Didn't you read Cosmo in college?"

"Well, let's see. If I'm unobservant enough to collide with this guy every day, doesn't it stand to reason that I'm unobservant enough to NOT notice his fingers? Besides, this is not a movie. This is real life! In real life, you don't run into somebody every day and then spill soup all over him like you are being THROWN in his direction and it turns into a romantic relationship. In real life, he thinks I'm a spaz!"

Then something I said made me stop.

"OMG! What if the universe is literally THROWING me into this guy and I'm too unobservant to even notice? What if I'm so stupid that the universe upped the anti and made me spill soup on him!"

"See? That's what I'm talking about!" my friend said. "You have to check this guy out the next time you see him. He's not just a guy in a lab coat, he could be your future husband!"

Just then, another therapist walked into the staff room. "Who are you talking about?"

"Dr. Tam."

"Why? Who's future husband is he supposed to be?"

A slew of hands pointed in my direction.

She walked over and put her hand on my shoulder. "Sweetie, Dr. Tam is gay."

Typical.