This morning I posted about a breakthrough I experienced this week doing The Artists Way program. It had to do with looking at areas in your life that you were experiencing jealousy. (or in my case, sarcasm and anger) As a result of the exercise, I found that this sarcasm was really a disguise for feeling under appreciated. And the friend with whom I had been feeling distant now I felt like a kindred soul; somebody who was in the same boat as me.
All day today, though, I had a little tickle in the back of my brain. In this blog, I try to protect my friend and family's anonymity. Sometimes, I share stories or specific details about others, as long as its in a funny, lighthearted, or irreverent way. Heavy stuff, I tend to shy away from unless its MY heavy stuff.
My post this morning felt to me like I crossed my self-imposed line. I felt like I shared a story that was not mine to share. And though I think that if this particular friend did stumble across my blog, she wouldn't mind, I cannot be 100% sure. That's a risk I just can't take.
It's funny, isn't it? How the line between real life and blog life can get blurry. Has anyone else ever experienced a similar conundrum? I'd love to hear about it.
2 comments:
I know that my parents read my blog, even though I've asked them not to. So, I have to be really careful what I say, which I hate. I can't talk about how I feel about my family, or about my husband being laid off, or about how much January makes me want to step in front of a bus. I find myself being less than honest on my blog (not DIShonest, just less than) and that frustrates me to no end. If I didn't already own the coolest domain name ever, I'd totally pack my bags & start over somewhere else.
All the same, I think that something that I did write did offend someone that used to be one of my best friends - although I can't verify that since she's no longer responding to emails or taking my phone calls. It's all very frustrating sometimes.
I have said things about my mom that I wouldn't want her to read, as she would be very offended (even though I think they were funny as hell). I write what I feel... but I don't want to have to defend my feelings... or explain them... etc. I've also worried what would happen if Ryan came across my blog... I know her... she's nosy and she'd read it all the way through. I've said things about her dad I wouldn't want her to read.
I hate the idea of censoring myself but I think it's for the best. But I've also been giving thought lately to starting a private blog to use as an online journal... a place where I can say whatever I like with no fear of being judged or hurting anyone.
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