Friday, April 10, 2009

Adventures in Grooming

While searching out there in bloggie land for new and exciting reads, I have often come across blogs where folks post pictures of their outfits, rave about new cosmetics, or review products for hair, skin, or nails. These posts fascinate me. They literally leave me slack-jawed and confused in front of the computer screen. I would love to be so skilled in the area of "girliness" that I could actually put it all out there for the world to read and maybe even solicit advice from.

Sadly, I am not skilled in this area. I am the opposite of skilled. I am Ty, the girl Brittney Murphy plays in "Clueless." Or worse. I'm more like a female version of Tarzan. If anyone were to get a peek inside my head, they would most likely be left slack-jawed and confused.

"Is she serious that she didn't wear any make-up until she turned 35?"
"How could she NOT OWN a hairdryer?"
"Didn't shave her legs until age 30!"

Yeah, yeah, and --I'm sorry to say-- yeah. I could get away with it, too. I was THAT cute! (if I ever get around to hooking up a scanner, I'll pull out some old pictures and scan them in to prove it.)

But now, as I approach age 40, I am finding that I'm not that cute anymore. I just can't pull off the disheveled, hippy-girl look and come off as quirky and fun. Now, I look eccentric and borderline nuts.

I'm coming to the conclusion that I have to venture into the world of cosmetics and hygiene products. And it scares me.

My experiences in the bathroom rival my bad dates.

Won't you join me on the adventure? Stay tuned for Friday's newest feature:


(I promise I'll try not to leave anyone emotionally scarred along the way.)


Heather said...

Oh, fun! I can't wait!! :)

Diane said...

I went to Target the other day, dressed in my normal Saturday garb (sweats, ponytail, no make-up, nerd glasses) and caught sight of myself in a mirror... I thought I looked like a GUY! It was awful. I came right home, changed my clothes, and put on mascara. Whew.

Anonymous said...

ooh! This part is so much fun. People always think I wear hardly any makeup but I do have a pretty involved routine, I just don't make it look heavy. I've been asked by more than a few girls who aren't into makeup "I like the way yours looks, will you show me?" And then I dive in. So I can't wait to hear what you experiment with!

I wish I were cute enough to get by without it but blotchy red skin and pale watery eyes just do not look as good without some work. One advantage: sunscreen in my foundation, it's good for the skin.

BTW though I'm into makeup, I'm not prissy. I don't fuss with my hair much and I don't give a darn about brand names in clothing.